Anorexia nervosa is just one eating disorder under the umbrella of these serious mental illnesses. They are all serious and deserve attention and devoted time and efforts to help support the individual struggling as well as those surrounding them. It can be extremely stressful and overwhelming for families and friends supporting the individual struggling with the eating disorder. Nevertheless, supporting with meals is an important way to ensure progress is made and a life free from the illness is encouraged and achieved. This can be achieved using several prompts and core values to ensure that a mealtime is calmly and effectively orchestrated. These include remaining calm, being confident, being consistent, and being compassionate. The individual carrying the eating disorder are often very stressed out and panicked by others support and ways in which they choose to challenge the eating disorder. Alongside this- they typically become very sensitive and in tune with other feelings and emotions which contribute to their initial levels of distress and discomfort. Therefore- staying calm helps to foster a more peaceful, positive, and predicate environment. 

 

Being confident will allow the individual to feel more secure and at ease in their environment. By a loved one remaining certain that the food which has been served is appropriate and correct will help calm the individuals nerves and worries. 

 

Being consistent and not leaving room for change or uncertainty is extremely important. Although a loved one may communicate what seem valid reasons to change and move plans surrounding mealtimes- they will most likely be led by an eating disorder and be aiming to provide security and follow the rules anorexia puts in place. So, stick with what you have decided and don’t negotiate. The feelings and atmosphere they create may be uncomfortable to endure- but they won’t last.

 

Don’t give into a loved one’s distress and panic, it’s the eating disorder that’s causing the upset. Which is even more reason to challenge it. Being compassionate means understanding that they’re doing something that is very difficult. Ensure you involve them in the decisions being made, meet their worries and concerns with thought and dedication, as well as always keeping in mind that what they’re doing has been made to feel alienated and isn’t as easy as it may appear to others. 

 

Some general ways to help navigate mealtimes include working alongside healthcare professionals to ensure the best support is in place for your loved one at home, working together as a “family” or “group” to ensure everyone feels supported and are aware of the rules and boundaries, avoiding blaming yourself or your loved one for the problems your facing- its nobody’s fault although you may doubt yourself, do not debate with your loved ones about eating or weight related concerns- it’s extremely likely that anorexia will twist your well-intended response in a way that harms your loved one, acknowledge your loved ones feelings and emphasis that you will remain there to support them no matter what, always remember that it will be tough at times, but don’t be tempted to give up, lower your expectations, or give into the eating disorder. Things will get better, but they just take time and patience. 

 

Often, mealtimes can create what most refer to as “meltdowns”, often meaning that an eating disorder is showing its pain and anguish in your loved one- showing immense amounts of discomfort and distress. These periods following a mealtime can be very difficult to navigate, but the same principles apply no matter what stage in treatment or recovery your loved one is at. These include staying calm, remaining positive, being consistent, being supportive, being proactive, using positive and productive coping skills, using relaxation techniques, trusting your own judgement as a loved one, as well as looking for triggers and remembering that meltdowns are to be expected and are healthy ways for an individual to express their emotions.